Thursday, October 06, 2005

No more sugar thanx

Massive overdose on Chockolate Oreos... It's only the second package of Oreos that I've bought in my life, but I think I'm done with them already. The same thing happened last time, overdosed and feel sick to my bones, just wanna hurl. At least they don't have them at home, so I don't have to see them for a long time.

I'm still pretty unproductive. Today was the very last day of the term, no more lectures, but three exams. For the first time, I'm faced with having to revise for two exams of subjects that I don't like and don't want to continue with. That feels scary, it is almost as if I'm doomed to do bad because I don't feel committed to the task. All I know is that I have to pass in order to be able to get support to stay here. But passing is not that difficult... that is not the issue here. It might be for the most difficult one, but I feel that the issue is that of passing with a good grade. Ah well. I will do my best, and I will soon start revising. Sunday will be the day when I start!

I had an absolutely disgusting dream last night. I dreamt that I was on a trip with some people, and just as I started to care about them and feel comfortable, this guy killed one of my friends. I crawled into his bed, and all that was left of him was his face, the guy had cut his face off and put it on his pillow so it looked like he was asleep. And then this guy came after me. He was chasing me, and I was always locking doors, fearing that I wouldn't be able to lock it before he caught up with me... You know, the fear that really feels piercing in a nightmare, where you wake up and still the stress and the fear is so strong that your heart is racing and you try to figure out what the dream might mean..

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